


I'll give you happiness

by LFMH021



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: A little OOCness but I tried my best, Adorable Neil, Andrew's POV I guess, Angst if you squint because this follows me everywhere I go, BTW Jealous Andrew, Cuz why not/, F/M, Few Spoilers, Fluff, Happy Foxes, Happy Neil, He's happy so Andrew's happy, He's not drunk though, Hot Neil, Humor, It's so hard to look into Andrew's mind, M/M, Mentions of minor characters, One Shot, Romance, THEY DESERVE IT, The Foxes love Neil so much, character study I guess, super duper fluff, very little angst, yey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-04
Updated: 2016-11-04
Packaged: 2018-08-29 00:23:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8468671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LFMH021/pseuds/LFMH021
Summary: Everyone deserves happiness. So do the Foxes. Especially Neil and Andrew. But Andrew is too scary too approach, so the Foxes try their very best to make Neil happy instead. They never thought what a blessing a happy Neil is.In short: Andrew is silently hating (falling in love with) Neil more as days pass by.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Neil Abram Josten deserve happiness, so I bring you happy Neil.
> 
> And because he's happy, the Foxes are also happy -- especially Andrew, although he won't admit it.
> 
> Here you go! Enjoy!

The Foxes – the ones that Neil call family—knew how much tragedy and pain Neil had encountered for the nineteen years of his life. They knew how much hardships he had gone through, and this was evident with the burn and knife scars on both of his cheeks. If one were lucky enough to be close with him, his heart would surely shatter once you see the scars all over Neil’s body – signs of battles he had won. He was the epitome of survival.

Instead of cringing, many looked up to him with the strength he had within him. To be able to wake up and face every day strongly despite everything he had encountered, he was a role model that those who suffer look up to.

However he strong he was, though, his façade also crumbled once in awhile. He had occasional panic attacks that were triggered by various things – a word, an action, a raise in one’s tone. Despite being a survivor, he was still a little young. Too young, in fact, to have suffered such close encounters with death.

The Foxes, of course, weren’t foreign with pain. Coach Wymack only recruits those who he sees to befit second, third, even the thousandth chance. It was no surprise that most of them had tragic past, traumas that they fought hard to overcome, demons and monsters that they hide deep within themselves. Instead of being a weakness, these pasts had become a way for them to become a whole or as Neil refer to them: a family.

Everyone deserves happiness, The Foxes deserve happiness. Especially Neil and Andrew. But damn, Andrew was too scary and dangerous to approach. Besides, Matt countered as they tried to gather ways how to make these two stubborn shits to be happy, Andrew’s bored expression is default—it was indeed difficult to even make him raise an eyebrow.

“Only Neil succeeds on making him change his expression,” Nicky said.

“Yeah, Andrew usually tries his best not to kill Neil himself,” Aaron commented as he busied himself with typing on his phone, probably texting with his cheerleader girlfriend, Katelyn.

“It’s our, the girls’, last year here, and we want to do our best to make him happy. It’ll truly relieve us if we know we could leave the campus without worrying if he was swallowed by sadness again,” Dan grumbled and crossed her arms across her chest.

“Geez, you have brains, right? Come on, gather ways on how to make that damn brat chuckle. All I saw from him are those rare smiles,” Allison complained and tossed her hair out of her face.

They turned silent again. The Foxes – except Neil and Andrew—were currently gathered inside the girls’ room to have a meeting on how to make Neil – and Andrew, if it was possible—chuckle or laugh. Aaron and Kevin were about to decline when Dan grabbed Aaron’s phone and threatened him that she’d call Katelyn’s attention of his absence. Nicky, on the other hand, said that he’d make Neil ask Andrew not to take them to Columbia soon if Kevin wouldn’t cooperate. Nicky wasn’t even sure if Neil would accept, but thankfully, Kevin sighed and finally agreed.

Which left them to their present predicament. Just half an hour before their morning practice starts.

Matt flailed his arms and then laid down on the floor. “I give up. His mind is very unpredictable. I don’t think he’d even get my jokes if I try to tell him one.”

Renee smiled and clasped her hands together on top of her lap. “I don’t think we should think about this too much. Neil sees us as his family. Let’s just be our normal selves and go with the flow, I think being with his ‘family’ would always be enough for him.”

“He’s so deprived of affection, I wanna cry,” Nicky whispered and feigned sadness with a little dash of pretending to wipe invisible tears.

“That kid deserves all the hugs in the world,” Dan mumbled with a sigh.

Kevin wrinkled his nose and stood up. “I don’t really care. As long as he does his best as vice captain for this day, I have no problem. The storm has passed. Don’t trouble yourselves with things that you shouldn’t worry about and focus on our upcoming games.”

Aaron rolled his eyes. “Typical Kevin.”

“You asshole, what do you mean with that?”

Aaron boredly continued his texting. “I meant—“

There were three taps on the door which halted their argument. The seven looked at the door. They blinked when it opened and Neil snuck a peek inside inserting only his head to look. “Hey,” He said.

“Hi Neil!” Nicky screamed in delight.

“Where’s Andrew?” Renee asked with a smile.

“I’m right here,” Andrew said from behind Neil. With a sigh, he shoved the striker inside the room. “You’re fucking slow.”

Neil rubbed his back with a frown. He shot Andrew an irritated look before settling on sitting beside Matt on the floor with a pout. Andrew sat on the couch, the space beside him vacant.

They held their breath as Andrew glared at Matt, who blinked. “I didn’t even do anything!” Matt grumbled.

“Neil.” A single word. It held so many meanings and implications between the two.

Neil frowned even more and hid behind Matt. “No, you’ve been bullying me since I woke up. I almost fell from the rooftop because of you. I’m sitting beside my best friend, Matt.”

It was the first time Neil actually admitted that he was best friend with Matt, so the latter gaped in surprise and then grabbed Neil in a hug. “Geez, man, that made me super happy!”

Neil tensed for a moment, relaxed, sent a grin up on Matt and then rubbed the nape of his neck in embarrassment right after Matt released him.

Andrew’s eyes darkened and everyone in the room –except Neil—stiffened.

Neil rolled his eyes at Andrew and then stood up. He was about to sit right down beside the blond goalkeeper when he tripped with Kevin’s long leg, which was right on his way, and fell right on Andrew’s protective and open arms.

Neil and Andrew stared at each other. And before long, everyone looked up when Neil suddenly erupted in fits of laughter. Even Aaron looked surprised.

Neil sat down on his designated seat but hadn’t stopped laughing.

 

Andrew wasn’t even particularly sure what the reason was with Neil’s sudden laughter. But he didn’t really care. As the auburn-head slumped down beside him, he couldn’t seem to take his eyes away from the former.

Neil clutched his stomach and then wiped the tears on his eyes.

Andrew was certain he had never heard anyone laugh like Neil before. It was not annoying. It was not maniacal. It was not too timid. It was…so _Neil._ It was the kind of laughter that brought everyone into halt. It somehow made the atmosphere lighter. It brightened the faces of those who heard it. It gave that feeling of contentment and happiness.

Andrew, of course, hates it. But he didn’t make any moves to stop Neil.

It was, after all, the first time Neil ever laughed like this.

After few more moments, the laughter finally subsided. Neil slumped on Andrew’s side after a questioning look to which Andrew nodded as an answer. Neil sighed and leaned his head on Andrew’s shoulder.

Andrew’s lip quirked as Neil blinked when he realized the others were staring at him, dazed. “W-What?”

Nicky squealed. “Oh my gosh, I don’t know why you were laughing, but damn, Neil, that was a very adorable laugh.”

“I feel very light-hearted,” Renee whispered with a small smile.

Dan sniffed. “I’m so happy. You laughed.”

Neil frowned. “I’m not a robot. I do know how to laugh.”

Matt smiled sheepishly. “It’s just that…we thought you couldn’t manage to do so anymore after everything that had happened to you.”

Neil smiled and leaned a little more closer to Andrew as the blond pulled him closer with the arm he had placed around Neil’s waist a little hesitantly at first. “I’m fine. I just have a weird sense of humor.”

Aaron scoffed. “Why were you even laughing?”

Neil shrugged. “Andrew looked like he was about to murder Kevin’s leg and the thought was so weird, I couldn’t help laughing.”

Kevin clutched his legs closer to his chest cautiously.

Allison smirked. “You _do_ have a weird sense of humor.”

Neil’s eyes twinkled, and Andrew hated him more for it.

* * *

 

 

The original Foxes weren’t as close with the Freshmen, but Neil was doing an effort to bring them closer towards him since he’d be their captain from next year onwards.

He wasn’t surprised to find Jack and Sheena to be the assholes of all assholes even bypassing Kevin. But he was trying his best, especially after Jack begun to shut his mouth right after Neil punched him three days ago.

The Freshmen were doing laps when another miracle happened.

Andrew was watching the goal against Kevin, who was fucking obsessed with trying to goal as usual, when Nicky and Allison broke into an argument.

Neil sighed from where he was teaching Brook how to pass the ball easily. “Guys! Come on!” He grumbled and removed his helmet to show the displeasure on his face.

Aaron rolled his eyes. “I’m getting out of here.” Just when he was about to take a step out of the court when Nicky took steps backward. Aaron accidentally bumped into Nicky’s back and he was caught unaware that he fell on his butt with a loud, “Fuuckmph.”

Andrew watched boredly as Aaron gathered all of his anger and was about to lash out at Nicky when giggles caught everyone’s attention.

Brook stared at Neil as the Foxes’ vice-captain held her racquet and was covering his giggles with a hand over his mouth.

Andrew looked around and resisted the urge to grab Neil and drag him to the roof so that they’d be alone. He really hated the way Kevin halted and was repressing his own smile with the cute noise Neil was creating.

“Fuck, Neil is so fucking adorable when he’s happy,” Matt commented as he removed his helmet and grinned.

“He’s so happy. I’m so happy,” Dan whispered in awe.

Andrew rolled his eyes and watched as Neil finally calmed down. He locked his blue eyes with Andrew’s hazel ones before giving the goalkeeper a warm smile that brought crinkles on the corners of his eyes.

So fucking annoying(ly beautiful). It sent warmth on his chest. Andrew’s eyes seemed to have forgotten about Neil’s scars and couldn’t look away.

Andrew hated (fell in love with) the striker more.

Since he was wearing a helmet and no one could see, he sent a small smile back towards Neil.

* * *

 

They were playing a Truth or Dare on the girls’ room when a third miracle happened.

“Kevin!” Nicky screamed. “Truth or Dare?”

Kevin cautiously crawled away a little. “…Dare.”

“I dare you to take a drag on one of Neil’s cigarette!” Nicky exclaimed.

Kevin looked at Andrew. He stared back.

“What?” Andrew finally asked after few moments.

Kevin huffed. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m just a little hesitant with this dare because you might be possessive of Neil’s cigarette as well.”

What a very odd idea. Andrew _almost_ laughed with its incredulity. Andrew looked unimpressed. “Go on,” He said as he looked at Neil, who was already staring at him. Why is Neil always giving him that look as if he was so happy and contented? “And stop looking at me like that.”

“I was just waiting for your signal,” Neil grunted as he took out a cigarette and handed it to Kevin. “Want me to light it for you?” He asked after Kevin accepted the cigarette.

Andrew tensed a little when Kevin nodded. He tried to keep his expression neutral as Neil leaned forward and lit up Kevin’s cigarette. Their hands brushed as Neil tried to steady the cigarette from Kevin’s mouth to succeed.

But there was no hidden motive on Neil’s moves. As quickly as he could, he settled down comfortably beside Andrew on the couch and silently whispered, “Yes or no?”

He looked down and realized Neil wanted to hold his hand. He blinked. “Yes.”

Neil smiled and intertwined his left hand with Andrew’s right. It felt right. It felt like two pieces of puzzles that were perfect for each other. Neil squeezed affectionately and after awhile, he squeezed back and felt Neil shift to move closer to him. It didn’t bother him, even just a bit.

Kevin took a drag and then choked when he couldn’t breathe all of the air out.

Everyone laughed but they looked up when Neil chuckled from beside Andrew. It wasn’t as long as the first two miracles but it sounded precious to their eyes, nonetheless.

Neil saw that everyone was staring at him again as if he performed a miracle, and then flushed. “Seriously?” He mumbled and hid his face on Andrew’s shoulder.

“You two are so fucking precious!” Nicky exclaimed.

“Can I hug that adorable kid on your shoulder, Andrew?” Allison asked.

He sent them a cold glare before pulling Neil closer. _No._

“Geez, fine, you possessive asshole. I’ll take a picture of him, it’ll last longer.”

* * *

 

The buzzer went off and the Foxes screamed for their first win for this season against the Jackals.

Andrew didn’t move from his spot as the Foxes gathered on where Neil was. He narrowed his eyes when Kevin bumped fists with Neil. They had performed two Raven-drill attacks and succeeded.

He scoffed when Matt whooped and then scooped Neil in a hug. He was ready to intervene until Neil looked up at Matt and grinned widely.

Matt seemed taken aback before squeezing the striker even tighter. He crossed his arms and glared at Matt. The latter sent an apologetic smile at him before grabbing Dan and kissing her.

Neil approached him after awhile and then extended a hand. “Let’s go.”

He stared at the hand, hesitant.

“Yes or no?”

It was always yes.

“You’re insufferable,” He growled and grabbed Neil by the wrist.

It was always yes with Neil.

* * *

 

Andrew sat on a large rock as he watched Neil and Renee spar. It was their first time to spar together since Neil usually just sat and watched once Andrew permitted him to come with him.

The fight was going for almost three minutes now and neither was ready to surrender.

Neil had bruises on his arms and then a cut on three of his fingers. Renee had bruises on her forearms for blocking Neil’s forceful punches.

After faking a mistake, Renee smirked and threw Neil on the ground. “Yield?” She whispered with a gentle smile.

She blinked when Neil laughed loudly and genuinely before nodding. “I surrender.”

As Andrew and Neil set to go back to the Fox Tower, she said firmly, “I am so glad you’re recovering, Neil. You should laugh more, it’s miraculous.”

He flushed and then bowed as a sign of ‘thank you,’ which Renee saw as funny and chuckled at.

* * *

 

Andrew was ready to face palm, but he resisted the urge.

Dan was telling Neil all about the responsibilities that he’d carry once he had become the Foxes’ captain.

He wrote them all on a notepad before verifying other stuff to Dan. After, he pocketed the notepad. They both gazed at the Foxes who were doing drills around them.

“I’m gonna miss this once I graduate,” Dan confessed.

“We’re going to miss you too, Dan,” Neil whispered back.

Andrew was running laps and he strained his ears to hear them over the sound of the balls bouncing on the wall because of Kevin and then Nicky and Allison’s arguments.

“So how do you think you’re doing as my vice captain?” Dan asked with an understanding tone.

He almost slipped when Neil replied,

“I think I’m _Neil_ ing it.”

Dan stared at Neil and then stuttered, “Oh my God, d-did y-you just—“ She cut herself off and then begun laughing.

Neil flushed. “Shit, I didn’t mean to say that. I didn’t even find it _pun_ ny.”

Dan laughed harder and clutched her stomach. “Fucking shit, Neil,” She heaved and then continued laughing as he feigned innocence.

Andrew wasn’t sure if he was proud or ashamed of Neil as Dan placed her hands on her knees and laughed until everyone begun to grow worried.

“Damn, Neil. I think you’ll do just fine,” Dan said between gasps.

Neil smiled. “I’ll do my very best. The Foxes will growl wildly once we win the championship again.”

“…Did you just use my surname?”

Andrew shook his head as Neil and Dan stared at each other before laughing like idiots in the middle of the court.

“We have the most messed up partners ever,” Matt commented beside him.

Andrew stared at where Neil stood. “I hate him.”

“Sure,” Matt said with an amused smile.

He really needed to put some venom on those words if he wanted people to believe him.

Not like he wanted them to believe those words. It was a total lie.

* * *

 

Wymack and Abby were also shocked when another burst of happiness came out of Neil.

It was Abby’s birthday and she decided to cook for the Foxes in her place. She made Andrew’s lot help her.

And that was where and when Wymack and Abby saw a miracle. They were sitting around the dining table and living room table with hot drinks. Nicky chose to drink lukewarm milk because he wanted to sleep early. He sipped and then ended up with milk mustache.

It was a common occurrence but Neil, who was deprived of every normal thing in the world, looked at Nicky’s milk mustache and broke into giggles. “Looks weird on you,” He said after, with a large smile.

He almost looked younger because of it.

Andrew looked at their nurse and coach to decipher their reactions. Wymack quickly composed himself but there was a small smile on his lips as he stared at Neil. Abby covered her mouth in surprise and then almost looked teary-eyed. “He looks so blissful.”

“Abby, you make it sound like he’s dead.”

Abby smacked Wymack upside the head.

Nicky ended up with milk on his nose. He mimicked a deer, and Neil grinned.

Andrew sipped his hot chocolate and watched silently as Neil tried it himself after much pestering from Dan and Matt. He almost smiled with the childishness he saw on Neil’s expression.

He was falling. But for some reason, his fear has begun to dissolve as he looked at Neil just few feet away from him.

* * *

 

The Foxes would be forever astounded with Neil Abram Josten – this, Andrew had found out when he heard commotions from the girls’ room just few minutes after he dropped Neil in that specific suite. He raised an eyebrow and went out of their room to find out what the ruckus was all about when Neil suddenly dashed right before him to the staircase.

He blinked. “Neil?”

Neil halted and then turned his head to regard him. “Oh, hi,” He said with a sheepish grin.

“Josten, come back here this instant!” Allison screamed and stormed out of their room holding scissors in one hand and a razor at the other. “We haven’t even started!” She complained.

Neil took a step down the stairs. “I won’t let you cut my hair again unless you tell me what kind of hairstyle you’re giving me this time. You might make me bald.”

Allison rolled her eyes and glanced at Andrew. He sent her a glare back. “As if I could do that. Do you really want my death to be caused by a simple haircut?”

“What was the make-up kit for then?” Neil asked with a frown and took another step down.

“Ah. I wanted to try putting eyeliner on you. You know, experiments of a catty bitch,” She answered with a smirk.

Neil shook his head. “No.”

“I guess I have no other option. Matt, Kevin, Nicky, get him!” Allison yelled. “You three owe me a favour, remember? I’m asking for it now.”

The three went out of the girls’ room with dejected faces and looked at Neil, who tensed. Andrew was about to intervene when he saw the mischievous glimmer on Neil’s eyes. “Three against one?” Neil asked and then cracked his fingers. “Where’s Aaron?”

“I don’t give a fucking care about this,” Aaron said as he slammed their room’s door shut.

“Sorry, Neil,” Nicky whispered before lunging at Neil. He missed by a foot as the striker side-stepped quickly. Matt tried grabbing him, but Neil twisted Matt’s hand away. Kevin blocked the staircase with his body, and this seemed to make Neil even more thrilled. The auburn-head grinned and then used the railings as his ride downstairs.

“Fucking shit,” Kevin gasped as he gaped on Neil, who was already at the second floor’s landing, unharmed and purposely showing off that he didn’t break a sweat.

Andrew was currently debating if he should scold Neil for such a reckless move or mentally clap with how surprising that was. And Andrew was rarely taken aback. Neil, of course, was the ever exception.

Renee poke her head out. “I forgot to tell you guys.” Her smile was slow and gentle. “Neil can do parkour. He’s also very flexible and quick-witted. Be careful, he was the one who caused the bruises on my knees the day before.”

Dan took out her phone out and pressed record when the three Foxes resumed on trying to catch Neil. They followed after the four as quickly as they could while Dan continued recording with her phone.

Dan and Allison stared, shocked, to find Kevin, Nicky and Matt on the floor, panting, while Neil was waving enthusiastically meters away.

“That damn brat. He’s so fucking fast,” Kevin grunted.

Matt laughed. “He outwitted us, I’m so ashamed right now.”

Nicky was gazing at Neil with an unreadable expression as he, too, panted. “But, think of it. Neil’s childishness is only showing nowadays because he has become his own person. Nineteen years, and this is the only time he has truly had fun.”

“Yeah, look at his face. He looks so happy. He has been deprived of such enjoyable experiences for nineteen years,” Dan agreed

“Stop being so fucking depressing, you assholes,” Allison grumbled and cupped her hands around her mouth to shout at Neil, “Alright, you win! Just hair cut, I’ll show you what style it is!”

Neil nodded and ran towards them. Instead of ending up infront of Allison though, he stopped before Andrew. He stared at him.

Andrew stared back. “What?”

“Yes or no?”

He frowned. He wasn’t even certain what Neil’s asking permission for, so he answered with, “For what?”

Neil blinked. “Do you want me to get a haircut? I mean—“

“I don’t really care as long as you don’t become bald, it will blind me if it’s the first thing I see everyday,” He said.

Neil laughed. “How about I try to color it again? Orange, maybe?”

“How about I just smack your face on the mud and permanently leave you there? You fucking junkie.”

The Foxes’ faces brightened when Neil laughed again.

* * *

 

Andrew was possessive, he had known this since he was born. He was also easily angered and annoyed although he could easily compose his outer appearance to make himself appear bored or uninterested.

He was also fairly rational and logical. He was violent for a reason, unlike Jack.

But he had never truly found out if he knew and if he could feel the emotion named: jealousy.

Neil was demisexual, which meant his eyes were for one person only, not because he swings either way but because he had grown an emotional attachment towards that person. Neil has stated this fact over and over again to people who kept pestering and confessing to him. This person, only few knew of course, was no one else but Andrew.

Andrew knew that deep within him, he believed Neil. However, he couldn’t shake the feeling he felt whenever Kevin and Neil were alone and were actually communicating other than just arguing and yelling.

He sat cross-legged in front of the goal as the others ran laps around the court as warm-up. Kevin and Neil stopped trying to score for awhile and removed their helmets to converse few meters away from Andrew.

“How about you try using your right again?” Neil suggested.

Kevin raised an eyebrow. “Why? I can perfectly score with my left hand again.”

“I think it will become an advantage if you can switch your grip from left to right and vice versa in the middle of the game depending on the situation. It can also bring a little shock against our opponents when you suddenly change the pace of the game and passing by simply changing which hand would grip your racquet,” Neil explained.

Kevin nodded, interested with the idea.

“I…actually want to try using my left hand too,” Neil admitted after awhile. Andrew frowned from where he sat. Neil had never mentioned it to him. “I think if I could somehow make a difference by simply learning the drills with both of my hands, it would make passing easier. Like, if I was going to be smashed on my right side, I could switch my grip to my left hand and still pass the ball while I regain my balance.”

Andrew narrowed his eyes when Kevin’s eyes lit up with Neil’s confession. “I can’t believe I’m saying this but I am so proud of your intuition, Neil.”

His hands tightened on his racquet when Neil actually flushed with the compliment he just received.

A blushing Neil. What a rare sight. Even Nicky and Matt were now silently eavesdropping and secretly peeking at Neil’s red face.

Kevin smirked. “How about we start today? Since you’re mastered the drills and the freshmen are being taught by Dan today, I’ll guide you with using your non-dominant hand to pass the ball or try to shoot a goal.”

“Do you need a ball?” Matt called out.

Kevin shook his head. “We’re just going with basics for today.”

Andrew’s nerves were tingling with annoyance when Kevin went right in front of Neil and personally took it upon himself to move Neil’s grip around the racquet’s handle to find the right place to grip it so that it’d be easier for him.

Too close. Andrew frowned in displeasure.

“I think that’s it. You okay holding it there?” Kevin asked as he gazed at Neil.

Neil moved his left arm and flexed it while gripping the racquet and then nodded with a smile. He looked up at Kevin. “Yeah.”

Kevin blinked with their proximity. Even from where Andrew sat, he could see the color filling the larger striker’s face. Kevin was staring right at Neil’s blue eyes.

“I just realized. You do have striking blue eyes,” Kevin mumbled, nonchalantly. His face was still a little red.

Nicky and Matt were waving and shaking their heads to signal to Kevin, but both were failing.

Those azure eyes that always followed Andrew everywhere were now focused at Kevin. Andrew stood up and banged his racquet on the goal’s metal edge.

Kevin stiffened and turned to look at him.

He removed his helmet and narrowed his eyes at ex-Raven. “I’m right here, Day. I might just shove this racquet at you. Keep your eyes focused on the ball or I’ll strangle you.”

Neil blinked and looked at him. “You okay, Andrew?”

Neil and his damn obliviousness of the world around him. Andrew wanted nothing but to strangle the damn shit.

He took off towards them and wrapped a hand around Neil’s wrist. “I’ll let Kevin teach you with this stupid idea of yours. But if I see that there is no two feet away between you, I will not let you play with your left hand.”

Neil rolled his eyes. “Andrew, I already told you: I’m demisexual.”

“Is that a yes or no?”

“Yes.”

Andrew stared at Neil, studying his face before nodding. “Two feet,” He reminded before going back to his goal.

Since then, Kevin tried his best not to look too long at Neil’s face again.

* * *

 

They were having a Movie night without the Freshmen. It was supposed to be a happy event except today was the anniversary of the death of Neil’s mother. This, he whispered as Andrew tried to make him go to class earlier.

Neil was always okay. He was always fine. If he wasn’t, it was usually because of something that was hurting him physically.

Today was an exception. Everyone noticed the change with his aura, and had sent Andrew a questioning look for almost the hundredth time. He answered them with a glare. It was Wymack who had answered them with words after practice started and while Neil was taking a shower. “His mother’s death anniversary.”

Kevin suddenly looked guilty with all the words and insults he had sent his co-striker just few minutes ago.

Nicky gasped and then rubbed the back of his neck. Probably regretting trying to make jokes at Neil just to see the latter smile.

They were just so used with a happy Neil that it was heartbreaking to see him so silent, so distant and spaced out. So Dan threatened everyone –except the Freshmen—to a Movie Night.

Neil went, and so did Andrew. They were the first ones to arrive, and Dan was currently looking for a movie to play with Matt on the bedroom.

But the movie wasn’t even starting when Neil whispered, “Yes or no?”

Andrew sent him a questioning look. Neil was currently leaning on his side. “What for?”

“Can I rest my head on your thigh and then sleep?”

“We can just go back to our room.”

Neil shook his head. “I don’t want to stay there yet. I prefer to sleep here with the others. Will that be alright?”

“If I told you no, you’d probably wake up screaming and panicking in your bunk bed.”

“So yes or no?”

They both learned that consent was still important in every circumstance.

He nodded. “Yes.”

Neil smiled and then settled down. Few minutes of staring at Andrew’s features and he was asleep while clutching Andrew’s hand after a murmured, “Yes or no?” Of course, Andrew answered with ‘Yes.’

The door opened and the Foxes came in one by one.

“Hey! You’re ear—“ Nicky lowered his voice when Andrew sent him a glare. “What…Oh, he’s asleep.” He then tiptoed on his usual place to sit on.

Aaron didn’t even spare a glance, which Andrew didn’t care about.

Kevin frowned at the sleeping striker. “I am so unused with this Neil. He didn’t even yell back at me earlier at practice.”

“He’ll come back tomorrow, he assured me,” Andrew said with a bored tone.

Kevin nodded and settled on the floor before the couch without touching neither Andrew nor Neil.

Matt blinked at them before going out of the room; he reappeared with a blanket and draped it over Neil’s sleeping form. He ignored Andrew’s cold stare. “I think he’ll be asleep until tomorrow.”

Allison and Renee entered the room. Allison shut her mouth the moment she saw them.

Neil’s face was turned towards Andrew’s stomach. He mumbled something and then snuggled closer.

Renee slouched and then placed a palm over Neil’s forehead.

Fortunately, nothing seemed to wake the striker up.

“I think he has a mild fever,” She whispered. “Has he taken his medicine?”

Andrew shook his head. “He kept saying that he was ‘fine,’ so I let him be. I’ll insist the medicines if his temperature gets higher.”

Allison rolled her eyes, disappeared to her bedroom and then re-emerged with a gel pack which you place on one’s forehead. Silently, she casted Neil’s bangs away and placed it on his forehead. The auburn-head stirred, even Andrew tensed, but then sighed into the coldness on his forehead. “That should do it,” Allison whispered and patted Neil’s cheek affectionately.

Dan distributed the food as quietly as she could. She handed over sundae on cup to Andrew. “Don’t drop any on Neil,” She warned and started the movie.

Nicky stood in the middle of the movie for bathroom break. As he was about to sit, he took Andrew’s empty cup after a little flinch with Andrew’s glare. “I was just taking it away. Holding it stiffly probably wasn’t comfortable anyway.”

Neil stirred a little and then sniffed. He shivered, and Matt quickly set the temperature higher. The striker buried his nose on Andrew’s belly and then squeezed Andrew’s hand.

He wasn’t even paying any attention on the movie. He stared at Neil all throughout just to make sure the latter wasn’t having nightmares again. He tensed whenever Neil mumbled or stirred, ready to call the striker’s name to wake him up.

It felt odd to see Neil in this state. The Foxes, Wymack and Abby were all aware of this. Neil had been a bridge to form the Foxes into a family. And they all felt obliged to make sure he was happy too. Secured. Safe. It was the least they thought they could do for someone who had been into too much pain but continued surviving.

“I have always wondered…” Renee started in a whisper when Dan was looking for a new movie after the first one, but everyone was paying attention to her. She looked up at him with a smile. “What makes you happy, Andrew? Neil is truly happy now despite the occasional ups and downs. But how about you?”

Andrew, who had been into a lot as well, had never felt like he was responsible for someone’s happiness. He just took his promises and deals seriously. But ‘this,’ whatever this was he had with Neil was neither a promise that could be broken or a deal that had time limit.

It was something he hadn’t chosen willingly.

It was something his heart – God, he had a heart, he just found out—decided on.

What was his happiness?

Neil sniffed again and then crumped his body into a fetal position as if he was shielding himself from whatever he was dreaming of. Andrew frowned and placed his other hand on the back of Neil’s neck. The striker sighed and then settled on a relaxed position before leaning into Andrew.

He was still fast asleep. And he looked so serene. So soft. So pure.

Why did Andrew deserve him?

What was his happiness?

Surprisingly, it was Aaron who seemed to have the answer, “Isn’t it obvious?” He asked from where he was seated on a beanbag and texting the Vixen cheerleader he was attached to.

“What do you mean?” Nicky asked.

“What is your happiness, Nicky?” Aaron countered, irritated.

“…The most important people in my life,” Nicky whispered.

“How about you, Matt?”

“Dan, my mom and dad and you guys.”

Aaron raised an eyebrow and stared right at Andrew. “So what do you think is Andrew’s happiness?”

The others blinked and then simultaneously looked at the bundle of adorable striker on his lap, asleep and oblivious.

Renee smiled and nodded. That seemed to settle it.

They continued the movie, and argued quietly after about anything and everything.

What was his happiness?

Neil stirred again, and then slowly opened his eyes with a sniff. Andrew stared at him. “Staring,” Neil teased, murmured with a small smile. Genuine. Whole-heartedly. Tenderly.

The answer was right before him, all along.

Andrew raised an eyebrow. “Sleep, Neil. I won’t go anywhere.”

Neil, of course, remembered those words which were his originally. He smiled and nodded.

“I hate you.”

Neil chuckled. “’Night,” He mumbled and snuggled on Andrew’s belly, asleep again in a matter of few seconds.

Andrew was sure Neil heard the hidden meaning of those three words, and that was enough. As everyone was busy drinking and arguing, he sent the asleep striker the smallest smile he could manage. It was so small, it was barely there, but it was a step forward towards more healing.

 

**Author's Note:**

> And that's it! I hope you enjoyed it! Sorry for the little angst at the end, it follows me everywhere.
> 
> Kudos and comments are super appreciated.


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